No Country

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I

I am insatiable and infinite

living inside my hunger

A woman of consequence, guileless and guilty, 

shapeless from shame

wishing gravity or inertia had pushed me over your borders 

to stake my claim,

forging the gulf of your neck 

to descend the valley between your mouth

Say my name because I can’t remember it

and yours keeps changing with elevation,

I need a witness to this white-hot light

I need a soldier to siege this new country,

to navigate the impossible landmines 

of what I feel for you

because my essential nature is denial, 

I remind myself of this, I will deny myself the land of you 

until I completely unravel

Until there is no country left to call home

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II

No one wants obsession unless it’s mutual

I remind myself of this

And once my desire becomes the object of my desire, 

will I know where I belong once I’m no longer obsessed with you?

Floating around this planet, grinding stones to powder,

burning branches to ash

No country will feel right, no taste will taste like home, 

nothing will compare to swimming in a sea of you 

And how strange to feel this way, I think,

because I never really knew you or, if I did, 

it was far too late for undiscovered territory

Will I always regret that you never whispered my name

to remind me of when we met, and how you feel about me, 

by what you choose to call me

But you don’t call me anything anymore

————-

(above)
Autobiogenesis, Day 225
2019
Fire + Three Fingers on Panel
4 x 4 in

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